The cleft chin is followed by a great smile. Followed by an equally impressive shirtless pic. Followed by a Serbian flag. The name? Dragan. Right, no doubt about his whereabouts then. Under “About Me” he writes, “Looks Good”. Music? Rock and Roll. Movies? The Godfather. A man of few words. I think, wait a tick, are they running scams out of Serbia now? Or did the Nigerian scammers move to Serbia? Cynical, I know.
Still, I decide Dragan warrants checking out and I run his info through my Bitch Cave database. All legit. So I fashion a response and studiously forget about it. He writes me an email asking to “met” me. That he had just moved here three months ago and “I working everyday so not really time to hang out”. But that if I texted him my number, we could “make dill” to meet somewhere. I suggest Sunday but he can’t as it is “eastern and big Serbian party at church”. I figure out the messages are easier to understand if I read it with a Serbian accent.
He reveals he’s an electrical engineer but has had to work lower paying jobs since his move to the US. I tell Carmen San Diego this and tell her that I think I will in fact be making dill with Dragan. “And how old is Serbia?, “ Carmen asks with a twinkle in her eye. “Oh, I dunno, “ I say flippantly, “30? 26?”
She says nothing but looks at me with a broad smile. I shrug, “Maybe we’ll talk about his cleft chin?” It’s then that I realize that he still fell within the category of Lady Liberty’s huddled masses. Oh well. Lots can happen between “Eastern” and the next few weeks. Will I find myself calling someone Honey Bee, sipping mint juleps whilst betting on horses i.e. Kentucky? Or will I find myself as a new “snaha” possessed by a dark and brooding jealous type without any hope to live up to his mother?
Just at that moment, my phone dings and it’s a text from B. “Hey”, he says. I roll my eyes at his usual eloquence. I miss him but decide there and then that he’s just such a jack ass. How do they know to reach you at the very moment others come a-courting??? Finally, it’s a-trickling Men but I’m not quite sure if it’s due a Hallelujah.